A clean slate

2011 was not my favorite year, too much loss, too much heartache and too little happiness. It had it's golden moments for sure but over all it was not a good one. When things get's really bad I always say that at least no one died, but sadly it was two times 2011 I couldn't say that. I might have gotten my heart broken by a foolish boy but compared to loosing people that is nothing. One of my favorite singer/poet has written a song where he sings: As long as I am here you will be here too. I think that is very beautiful and true. I will carry the memories of these people with me as I face a new year and new challenges.
Some of us like to make promises as we welcome the new year. Last night I decided that I need to start dreaming again. I wonder where they all went...I'm usually the person who tells other people that it is so important to dream and to believe that you can make it happen. I think that I kind of forgot myself on the way. I'm not unhappy, don't get me wrong but I think it's so easy to get comfortable, to stop challenging yourself and really put yourself out there. I think people like when there is a new year ahead of us because it feels like we are given a new chance, a clean slate. Now I just have to find out what I want to do with mine...but it will involve my love for photography for sure. I'll keep you posted...

xoxo

Canon is my homie

I've gotten the question a lot of what kind of camera I use. I started out as an analog photographer. In high school I fell in love with the darkroom and I spent as much time has possible there. Back then I was only interested in black and white photography. This continued at art school and it wasn't until I went to photography school that I started to use digital cameras. This was a little more than 5 years ago. After a short romance with an Olympus I switched to Canon. I bought a 5D and it has been a wonderful companion until a couple of month ago when it broke down after a fall which I wasn't responsible for. It might seem strange but that made so sad. I've had so much fun with that camera, we have been so many places and met so many people together.
I'm waiting for the release of the 5D Mark 3. Until then I have invested in two used 5Ds. It's the perfect camera for me. I will never get a Hasselblad, which if you didn't know is a swedish invention to begin with, it's so expensive and so heavy. I also love digital photography. It gives me a kind of freedom that I didn't have before and I truly enjoy getting away from the chemicals and the dark. Someone once told me that there are no mistakes with digital as there is with analog, that there is no room for something unexpected to happen but I disagree. There are still so many things I can't control like the weather, the natural light and of coruse how the person I photograph appears. 

Self portrait in the forrest close to where I grew up

Cleaning out my closet...

Photos are like frozen moments of time. When ever I see one that I've taken it's like I travel back in time. They make me remember and in my head it's like a short film being played. I like to put images on my walls because it makes me feel surrounded by loved once and the memories of them. But today I've torn a bunch of these photos into thousands of pieces...sometimes there are somethings or people you just don't want to remember anymore. It felt good ripping the memories apart and throwing it out with the trash.
I tell people that I have the memory of a goldfish while my beloved sister says that I am long-sighted, maybe I'm something in between. There are now things in my life that I know I can never forgive...but I will try to forget, like there never was any photos taken. And it makes me glad to know that as long as I am blessed with this life there will be many images to come, many new frozen moments of time.

Red headed woman

Once more I've been in Berlin and once more I have photographed this red headed lovely woman called Anneke (Cymage Models Berlin). With the company of her little cute dog Willie we walked around in one of Berlin's huge parks...can't remember the name of it right now. The light was amazing, it was cold as hell and we had a blast. Even if I only photographed Anneke for 1 h I got so many pictures that I really like
xoxo

Darkness

Weddings

During Summer I photograph a lot of weddings. This year I had a total of 13. I already got 10 bookings for next year so hopefully I will have even more 2012. If you are curious of what my wedding pics looks like go to www.turturduva.se Everything is in Swedish but feel free to ask if there is something you would like to know more about.

Gerri (Berlin)

People say it's harder to make new friends the older you get. It might be a little bit true because it's easy to get to know people if you for example go to a new school or so. But I truly beleive it's so much about being awake and seeing what kind of energy a person has. The first time I meet Gerri my life had just been turned upside down. Normally I think people would say that I come of as quite solid, happy and strong. I was so far away from that half a year ago. But I believe that is why I connected so fast with this lovely woman. When you start of by letting your guard down and that other person values that, it's just wonderful...so how could I say no when she asked if I could take a portrait of her. The light was just amazing that day in Berlin and we had so much fun talking about life, love and things in between. See you in February darling!
 

A tiny rose

Anica

This is the  German model Anica that I photographed one lovely afternoon in Berlin a couple of weeks ago. The main reason for going to Berlin was to take part in the GIRLS exhibition but while I was there I also found some time to photograph models and friends. This cool and beautiful young woman I found through the Berlin based model agency Cymage Models Berlin.